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Roy Peter Clark: 20 reasons why the Rays will beat the Dodgers in the World Series

Bill DeYoung

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RPC with lucky Rays caps stacked up and ready to go.

Twenty reasons why the Rays will beat the Dodgers in the World Series.

  1. The Rays retired Jackie Robinson’s number 42 and absorbed the power of his Dodger greatness.
  2. The Rays retired a number for coach Don Zimmer, who began his long career as a Dodger but wound up a good luck charm for the Rays.
  3. After being born with kind of a dumb name, our team exorcised the Devil and was reborn with a great name – the Rays! The Dodgers deleted the word “Trolley” from their original name “Trolley Dodgers,” named after fans who had to avoid trolley traffic on the way to the games. The Dodgers were left with a great name – if they were a dodgeball team. 
  4. Back in Brooklyn, a favored nickname for the Dodgers was the Bums. Yankee fans gave them the Bronx cheer.
  5. The Dodgers lost the most famous game in history in 1951 against the New York Giants, the game in which Bobby Thomson hit a home run in the bottom of the ninth inning to win the pennant. It is still known as the “Shot Heard Round the World.” Turns out, the Giants were stealing signs, using binoculars. The Dodgers lost to sign stealers. The Rays beat the Astros, the most infamous sign stealers of all.
  6. The Dodgers have a pitcher with nasty blown-out crazy red hair – as if Donald Trump got a perm. The Rays have the most handsome man in baseball, Kevin Kiermaier, with those dreamy eyes. They really pop when he’s wearing a mask.
  7. Hurricanes extinguish wildfires.
  8. Vin Scully has retired. Kirk Gibson, too. Oh, and Sandy Koufax.
  9. We have fans in Montreal.
  10. Our West Coast is nicer than your West Coast.
  11. I was born in 1948, and the Dodgers lost the World Series, in 1949, 52, 53, and 56. Ok, so they won in 55.  Sandy Amoros made a great catch, robbing Yogi Berra.
  12. There was only one no-hitter in a World Series. Don Larsen pitched a perfect game for the Yankees against the Dodgers in 1956. The Rays have three pitchers who are better than Larsen.
  13. The Rays are used to playing in a stadium with a small crowd. And the fans at the Trop don’t leave games early to beat the traffic.
  14. We are closer to Cuba and liberated Randy Arozarena.
  15. “Willy Adames, he’s our man! If he can’t do it, nobody can!!!”
  16. During the original spring training, a squadron of pelicans pooped on my car. Like all over.  A really good sign, since the brown pelican had just been selected as the official bird of the City of St. Pete. At the mall the other day, we saw a car with the license plate RAYS WIN. It also had bird poop on it.
  17. The Dodgers’ home is Los Angeles, the City of Angels. Not bad. But the Rays home is named after St. Peter, who, we know, holds the keys to the kingdom. The Burg of St. Peter is actually heaven.
  18. During his years in Spring Training, Babe Ruth put St. Pete on the baseball map. He is said to have hit one of the longest home runs in history at the old spring training field near Crescent Lake Park, where my wife and I often take our morning strolls.
  19. David, not Goliath. Small budget, not big budget. The U.S. Olympic Hockey team, not the Soviet Union.
  20. Baseball caps are good luck during the playoffs, sometimes worn backwards or inside out. In game seven against the cheatin’ Astros, I wore all 11 of my Rays caps, one on top of the other. It worked. And they are ready to go again.

Prediction: RAYS WIN, 4 games to 2. (In the deciding game, Kiermaier hits a walk-off homer against the nasty looking pitcher wearing the curly red fright wig.)

Oct. 15: Roy on The Catalyst Sessions.

 

 

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